tempertantrums

This post is 100% about my own....the babe is a doll.

I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO WORK!!

BLA!!

I have neglected this blog and my intentions were to keep really up to date with this one so I could see how my doll have grown, but man it has been hard. She is on the move and demanding of attention, which I happily give to her, but therefore not doing anything else. We also got rid of the laptops in favor of the desktop and that has really halted a lot of computer time. The lowered screen time is for the better, it was intentionally reduced, but I do miss it sometimes. Change is tough.

So the little princess is off to daycare next month and I am devastated. It will break my heart to send her and I spent a lot of time picking this place, sort of. Everyone says it will be harder for me than it will be for her, like that makes it better. I don't care for things to be hard on either of us if I am able to choose. We have miles to go before I feel she will be ready to be on her own, and unfortunately, we do not have miles left in our journey. I rack my brain to think about how things could have been done differently or were they done perfectly and transitions will always be hard?!? I don't know.
I know there will be moments, probably a lot of them at first where she needs me and I won't be there and that bothers me. I hate for her to think I am not there to meet her needs. It is worse to think she will adjust and then not need me. I equally hate the idea that I can be phased out.

She is 11 months next Monday. She crawls easily, walks with support, tries to walk without for a few steps, eats like a trooper, still nurses, smiles, waves, claps, plays peek-a-boo that she initiates, laughs, plays tricks, blows raspberries, shows sincere affection and gives the best hugs. She is brilliant and independent, yet still loves to cuddle for stories. She wants to help with everything and likes real jobs, not fake ones. She can already tell the difference.

unwrapping a gift early

I thought that I would update pictures to both blogs and share a sneak peak of the christmas cards we had made with Kenz and the boys.

We did a somewhat impromptu photo shoot in the living room one afternoon. Nothing professional as you will see, just the family camera, very patient dogs and a baby.
We had our cards made online, so the actual card looks professional, with fun family style pics.

This gives you an idea of what sorts of shots we got. The final card is a collage of a bunch of the best.


Kenz in her 'my first Christmas' shirt. We added in some balls and a sled we use as an outside decoration to finish the look.


This one is a fav and I feel as though Edward was drawing some inspiration from the Grinch whole stole Christmas. Drake was a bit of a stick in the mud that day, so he lent his santa coat to Kenz for the pic. It is good when the kids are the same size in holiday costumes for photo opportunities.




This last picture is perhaps where Edward threw in the towel. Once Kenz knew the coat would fit, she was going to test out the antlers as well.

oi the pain

The babe is teething, which I feel she has been doing for MONTHS, literally months of swollen gums, chewing, drooling and crank, but white teeth have finally erupted through the gums. I use the word teeth as she is teething top and bottom at the same time. Her top right and bottom left are both poking through (which will make for a cute monster style smile) and her partnered top and bottom teeth are so close. She has swollen gums and bumps in those spaces with ripping tissue. I imagine kids handle teething all in their own ways, and true to form, my girl is handling it in the most dramatic fashion possible. I am giving her some slack as 2-4 teeth all at once is probably a bit much and more than likely super painful. I would go as far as saying sleep is being interrupted by this process, but I am far to realistic that she never sleeps to imagine this is the cause.

we have a christmas party tomorrow......and I can't take her as she is for too long.....but this may be a blessing in disguise.

cruising

The girl has started to cruise - I think this is what savvy parents call it. What she has really started doing, is what proud parents call walking. Sure she has to hang onto the play pen sides for support, but her legs are doing the moving. I am almost certain that rehab patients who learn to 'walk' again and use the bars for support are still considered walking.....so the proud parent will consider this walking.

She is able to go from one side of the playpen to the other at this time. She still can't master the 'let go and get down' part, but she is working on it I am sure. Bending your knees seems to be one of the last skills she is going to have. I have been placing soft stuffies behind her for the fall to your bottom moments that happen when she finally lets go of the sides.

Yesterday, on a rainy Sunday afternoon she had another big girl moment.....she went for a nap without me. It stings! We were having a movie day with tons of blankets and pillows on the living room floor and she feel asleep with papa while watching a movie. I should be grateful he has the patience to make it through the cries, and attempts to find mom before falling asleep.

unheld yoga pose

mommy and me yoga took a new turn this week. today was the first class we had been to since Kenz was actively on the move, and boy was she ever today. our regular classes had her sitting beside me on a blanket, playing with toys, snacking and wandering about a foot away when not crawling on me. today she was off to explore and on the move the entire time. she was on everyone's mat, 'borrowing' toys without asking, chasing the other moving babies and still climbing on me. it is near impossible to get a good pose when you are always watching the baby crawl somewhere, and then running to grab her before she smacks a sleeping kid, or gets hit by a mother not seeing her on their mat. I hit a full sprint mid pose a few times today. she may be getting to an age where yoga doesn't work anymore....which will be sad. I was out of classes at then end of today and bought the 5 class package again, in hopes it works out for 5 more weeks.

all you can do is build it

We bought a second car seat last night which came in a big box. I immediately knew I needed to make a fort for the babes out of this. It is not the first big box to come through these doors in the last short while and I am kicking myself for throwing out the last one - it was an awesome one.

I taped it shut again to make it a sealed unit and started to cut a door in one side. I was pretty pumped about the image in my head and how it would turn out. On the front side, I cut a door that has a small handle cut out and a window. On the right I made a doggy door and then additional windows on the back and left.

In my head it is super awesome. In reality none of the cuts line up all that well and it looks like a kindergarten student hacked it with safety scissors. I suppose it is rustic. Regardless, I made what I thought was a cool fort/house/castle for the wee girl.

The baby is fascinated with crawling under tables, through the ironing board, over toys and exploring in general. I really thought she would be pumped to crawl through this little space, in through the door and out through the doggy door. I thought the windows would be a cool spot to play peek a boo with her.....but alas she finds it icky. She had no desire to venture in and a strong desire to get out when placed in there by a needy mom.

The sunny side to the story is that the dog loves it. He ran in through the front door and back out through the doggy door. He took a few toys in and lay down inside. I suppose that one small being getting joy from it was the intention of making it, so the day was a success.

timeline and to do's

I have set a fake time line in my head that attaches some parental to do's to it.
My babe is growing up and I am starting to see the return to work on the horizon. It is still 4 months away and that is a significant amount of time, but I am sensing the need to prepare. Is there never a moment to just enjoy babies? I feel like I am always prepping for the next step.

This preparation is more for me....I think. Currently, the situation is this: The baby is breastfed all the time and eats 3ish meals a day. She has refused a bottle, but is starting on a sippy cup. She feeds to sleep for naps and bedtime. As I will not be going to daycare with her, I need to find a way for her to nap without feeding to sleep and to take milk from a sippy if she needs it during the day.

At 9m babies are to have a transition in how they eat. Currently is is always milk offered first, then solids. This does a flip at 9m and she will begin eating more hopefully. My goals were to get her onto this new routine and then at 10m start to prep for daycare. That gives me 2 months to try a sippy cup before nap and just cuddles to sleep and to replace 1 or 2 feeds during the day with a snack. We are going to continue to breastfeed morning and night for a while after daycare starts.

At 11m I am hoping to start her at the daycare 1 day a week for the first week, then 2 days for week 2 and 3 and then 3 days for week 4. I think this transition is just for me as well. I guess it will help her adjust to their routine and how to 'survive' without me hovering over her.

I see the appeal of a SAHM on some levels. I am sure I will be happy to be back at work though too and into an adult life again. I know my bank account is pleading for me to go back early, but it will never win.